Character Creation Challenge

 I recently saw that Character Creation Challenge is set for January. This is a challenge where every day of January you make a new table top rpg character. You can use the same system for all of your characters or you can use it as an opportunity to explore a variety of systems.

I have heard of this before and have felt intrigued. But I guess I also feel mixed. Part of me feels like it would be fun. I currently have access to 8 roleplaying game character creation rules. Most of them I haven't used before. But part of me also feels like it could turn into a burden especially as character creation can be a pretty involved process depending on how seriously you take it. I guess the problem is that sometimes I probably wouldn't feel like doing it. Then it is kind of like a choice of whether I am going to pump out a low effort character just to keep the challenge going or if I am going to skip it and feel some guilt that I set out on this challenge and didn't finish it. 

Part of me also feels a bit mixed about committing to table top character creation just because I have been more hipped on video games lately. Part of me would like to do a challenge more around that. But I guess one of the nice things about the character creation challenge is just that it has gotten some attention and people are spreading the word. So it would feel more like I was participating in something rather than just going my own way doing my own thing.

I guess one solution would be to include video game character creation processes as part of the challenge. Video game character creation can still be fairly involved but it is generally less so than table top game creation processes.

 So, basically at this point I am just kind of considering it. I kind of like the idea and have kind of been looking for a goal. I still have a few days to consider it or maybe come up with an alternative.

 

Problem solving

 Problem solving is a big part of gaming. This is the follow through of a decision. You have to identify the obstacles and then find a way of overcoming them.

 So why is problem solving fun? I think a big part of it is that there is a reward. The reward is a feeling of competence. The more difficult the problem the more the feeling of competence. Of course many areas of life involve problem solving. So why games? Well a big part of it is that it is voluntary. You choose to do it and can put it down whenever you don't feel like dealing with it anymore. Problems in life don't really have this kind of feature. There are also in game rewards like the progression of the story or sometimes other rewards that are closer or farther away from symbolic money. 

I guess one thing I am interested in is the degree that problem solving can be learned. What I mean is that when I study chess I am learning about problem solving in that one particular context. But I am curious about whether there aspects of problem solving that can be learned in one game and transferred to other games. Sometimes it seems like the only way to get good at a game is to double down on that specific game. But I am curious if there is some path where one plays many games and so gets good at the general skill of identifying and solving problems.

Moods

 I think a big part of video gaming is finding the right game for your mood. I think there is an art to managing your library of games and finding a game that suits your mood. It is kind of like having a music library. It takes some effort to figure out what you are in the mood to listen to. 

One thing that happens is sometimes you have certain reliable games that always seem to scratch a certain itch. But as I mentioned about Elder Scrolls Online in a previous post, these reliable games can be a bit of trap that prevents you from playing other things.

So it is kind of an art to figure out when you are in the mood to try something new and to try to figure out what will suit the particular feelings you are having in that moment.

I think one thing that complicates this with video games is just that like there is kind of this idea of finishing games. This usually takes multiple sessions. I think sometimes I kind of have this idea that like I should pick up one game and stick with it until I finish it. There is something about this that is kind of appealing in terms of having an accomplishment that I can definitely state. "I finished game x." But sometimes I kind of feel like this is sort of artificial and the reality is that bouncing around from game to game is a lot more common or like suitable. There will be some games that get finished along the way but like maybe it is more important to get good at finding something that suits your mood.

And this bouncing around doesn't have to be really anything to do with the game. It is not an objective statement of a games worth if I say that it didn't click with me or I played it some and moved on.

I guess there is some kind of subtle moral claim in this. I remember that someone told me that they read a lot but they hadn't finished a book in a long time. I guess that is kind of what I am getting at now but like at the time I thought that was definitely wrong somehow. Like, obviously you are supposed to start a book and then finish it. You can also see this in that there are a lot of people who invest in the idea of working through their "backlog" which is the video games you have bought but haven't played / finished. There is something like eating your vegetables. You don't want to do it but it is good for you.

I think there is some value in just doing what you like and letting things happen naturally. But at the same time gaming is very goal oriented. There are endless lists and achievements for completing tasks. So I think it is kind of baked into the hobby that this kind of goal oriented mindset is a big part of it. So something always gets left feeling kind of unfinished when you are bouncing around a lot and that can kind of create a stress of its own. I think sometimes it is comforting to have a go to, even if it is just temporary. There can be a discomfort in bouncing around too much and not settling down on something.

Making decisions

Sometimes it seems like the only difference between a good decision and a bad decision is the follow through. What I mean is that sometimes it seems like almost any decision is a good one with the right follow through. I guess I am excluding obviously suicidal decisions. For example, in chess it really doesn't matter if you play a brilliant move or not. It is the follow up that matters. If you play a brilliant move but with the wrong idea it can be worse than playing a mediocre move with the correct follow up.

 

The struggle that I alluded to in a previous post is about making decisions. Obviously we try to make better decisions as time goes on. We try to learn. But it is a tough job. It's certainly possible to draw erroneous conclusions.

 

Basically the struggle is about pursuing a strategy. Pursuing a strategy is a matter of consistency. It can seem like (to me) that if I can just make a decision with sufficient depth of feeling then the rest will take care of itself. But the reality is that it is necessary to follow through regardless of how deeply felt a decision is.

 

I find it difficult to pursue strategies consistently. I tend to choose strategies kind of willy nilly and when I meet resistance I am quick to abandon them. Sometimes it is not even resistance so much as just getting pushed away from a decision by the currents of my own feelings. Sometimes I feel afraid of regret so I backtrack when it seems I will have to sacrifice something. Sometimes I plunge ahead without due regard for the consequences.

 

I feel the true path of games as a spiritual discipline has to do with making a study of decisions and learning to make better ones by building coherent strategies.

 

 

Update 4

 Kind of mixed these days.

1) I did follow the rest of the chess world championship. Gukesh won without going to tiebreaks. There were 5 decisive games. So that is ok for a 14 game match. But overall I didn't feel super excited. 

2) Been sticking to video games but been kind of bouncing around. 

    Started Outer Worlds which is sci-fi rpg. Development was led by the pair of guys that also led development on Fallout and I guess there are a lot of similarities although I haven't played the Fallout games. I got Outer Worlds for free on Epic. It had been on my wishlist for a good while so I was happy to get it. Incidentally I got most of the Fallout games for free that way also. But anyways, I started it but didn't really feel super engaged.

    I also started Norco which is a highly rated indie pixel graphics point and click rpg type game. So far it is pretty weird in a way I like. It is set in a town outside of New Orleans where there is a refinery. It is in the near future and some things are different but it is mostly recognizable. There are some slightly depressing themes like the main character (Kay) returns to Norco from wandering around a fragmented US after the death of her mother and Kay's brother seems to be a pretty troubled person. So some of the family dynamics are kind of dysfunctional. The town is also polluted of course. But there is plenty that is intriguing about the setting and the game so far.

    I have also been playing Book of Hours. This is a game by a 2 person studio called Weather Factory. This is only their second game but the pair have some experience working on games for other studios. I played their first game and liked it but kind of put it down and haven't gone back to it. Their whole gig is that their games are about the occult and there is pretty minimal instruction in game about what you are supposed to do. I really like their take on the occult. It's done in a way that suggests that there are things you need to be careful about. But it is not really horrible or dark or evil. Kind of cozy in way without being cutesy. Anyways, it is a kind of card game in that you play with cards that appear for various reasons. You fit them in certain slots for buildings or to talk to people. There are also some items you can use in various ways. In this game you play as the librarian of an occult library. So the game is intriguing but I am also finding it frustrating because sometimes it seems like progress is pretty slow and comes with effort. Mostly this effort is in terms of figuring out how things work. Experience with the first game has helped a bit.

    Also started a game called Morimens. I guess this is what is called a gacha game. This means it involves a mechanic that is pretty similar to gambling. So the gambling is that you pay some kind of currency to get a "pull" which is a chance at winning some character or a variety of other things that you can use. There a variety of currencies some of which of course cost real world money. So the game is free to play but they try to rope you into paying for stuff. You can get some "pulls" with free currency that you earn from in game activities. So basically I have no intention of putting any money into the game. I am just kind of curious about what constitutes a gacha game and so am investigating this one because reviews are good and they claimed that the game is very generous with free pulls. But anyways, I played a bit but kind of dropped it because I was facing a problem that every time I would advance a stage the game would increase the suggested level of my characters but my characters didn't seem to level up and there didn't seem to be a way to level them up. I still have plenty of free pulls. (I only did 5 so far). So I might go back on to exhaust those just to get a better feel for how the game works.

    Morimens' combat is very directly imitating Slay the Spire a game I own and have played a bit of. This inspired me to go back to play that game. This is a video game but features deck building. You start out with a small deck of cards and as you play you are able to add more cards and upgrade cards you already have. I guess there are a couple of reasons why Slay the Spire hasn't really hooked me despite the fact that it is a very popular and VERY influential game. I came to it after having played Magic and basically there are many fewer cards in Slay the Spire and they are much, much simpler than Magic cards. This made Slay seem kind of boring in comparison. Secondly is just that I don't really like the art in Slay. It just has sort of a silly style that doesn't really appeal to me. That said, after playing Morimens I somehow felt I appreciated Slay a bit more.

3) Been playing most days but journaling still seems to take up a lot of time. Ellie is in Japan this weekend and the twins are away most of the time. Was kind of hoping I could really sink some hours into something this weekend but it is already Sunday night and I haven't done much. Just been doing some chores and taking care of the dogs and a good bit of fairly pointless journaling.

4) Looking forward to the Steam winter sale which starts Thursday night for me. The winter sale is the second biggest of the seasonal sales after summer. These sales usually feature drastic price cuts like 90% off. So it is possible to pick up a lot of games for quite cheap especially because I am mostly shopping for indie titles that are much less expensive to begin with.  That said, I have been a bit impatient and have pulled the trigger on some 80% off discounts on games on my wishlist this last week. Most of the games are less than 100 NT when discounted like this. 100 NT is about $3.33.

5) Partly in preparation for the winter sale, I have been working my way through the Buried Treasure blog from oldest to newest looking for games that he reviews that spark my interest enough to wishlist them. Most of them I pass by but I still have wishlisted a good number and also gotten some interesting free games.

6) The Game Awards happened although I didn't pay too much attention. I did see the list of winners today. The game of the year was a console game that didn't look that interesting and the games that did have PC versions just didn't seem to be my kind of thing. Balatro won a couple of awards. I have played this. It is vaguely poker related deck builder. It is ok. There was a lot of hype about it when it came out. I guess it is good in that it is rogue like (meaning you start over at the beginning each time you play) deck builder that is actually different than Slay the Spire. I didn't really feel hooked. Neva won an award. This game was on my radar but not enough to wishlist. I might take another look. 

7) I met my last goal of reviewing Suzerain after playing at least 10 hours but haven't really set a new goal. Kind of been wanting to in that I am feeling like I want a mission. But just been bouncing around so no really clear cut goal has presented itself yet.

Narrative and Games

 I think one thing I really like in games is a strong narrative. But tonight I was kind of thinking of how sometimes there is kind of a bit of conflict between the narrative and the more gamesy aspect of a game. What I mean is that sometimes I get hooked into the flow of the narrative and so the gamesy stuff will start to feel like it is interfering with the flow of the narrative, particularly if it stops me and I have to work on solving a problem.

But at the same time, when the gamesy aspect is too light or easy it can feel a little passive. Like I am playing along with the game rather than playing the game.

So there are two parts of me. One part kind of craves something that is more crunchy. This means like having more rules or systems or mechanics to master. The other part is the part that craves the narrative aspect.

But there is also kind of a laziness factor. If the crunchy part is too complicated or requires too much effort then I have tendency to just give up on learning it and so give up on the game to the extent it requires me to interact with those systems.

Part of it has to do with the somewhat disposable nature of games. There is part of me that feels like most of these various games I play will only be played one time if they are something like an RPG that is very story focused. And even with other kinds of games with greater replayability it can often seem like I will play it for a while and then move onto something else.

One attraction of a game like chess or go is that you know it has a great deal of depth, so the investment in the game seems worthwhile.

So for these reasons, it can seem a lot of times with games that it just doesn't feel super worth it to learn the mechanics and like master the builds because that knowledge of won't really be that useful when I move on to the next game.

But I feel like this is something I would like to change. This is because I really do feel intrigued by the crunchy part of games even though I am not very good at that stuff. One of the fascinations with a game like chess or go is the way players have mastered the technical apparatus of the games. I feel like I would like to get more comfortable learning these systems and how to do things with them. And I do think that there is some kind of transferable knowledge in these things. Basically, many of these mechanics do appear in many games. There may be variations but being familiar with the basics is transferable and will shed light on the ways that these mechanics are different.

I feel there are kind of two sides to this. One is my part in the sense that I feel like I need to make some effort to pay more attention to these systems. But I feel like part of it is the games. I feel like I need to be on the lookout for a game that kind of attracts me enough that it feels worth the effort of digging into.

 

Collecting and Games

 Just thinking a bit about collecting. I definitely have a collecting instinct. Whatever I am involved in I like to collect it. One of the appeals of Magic is collecting the cards. But I also have collected baseball cards, chess and go books, role playing books, and video games among other things.

Judging from video games, a lot of other people have the collecting bug as well because there are often collecting mechanics in games and some games center on this idea, like Pokemon for instance with collecting the monsters and whatnot.

But collecting comes with real problems too. First off, it generally costs money and I am not a rich man. In fact, I have debts I should be paying. Secondly, if you are collecting real world things then you need space to put the collected items. We also live in a small apartment and my stuff already takes up most of the space in my wife's and my room. Thirdly, there is a worry about counterfeit items. Fourthly, physical items can be destroyed by fire or disaster or stolen. They can also be difficult to transport. Fifthly, digital items often have the problem that they are trapped in some specific ecosystem that has a lifespan. If I buy Magic cards in real life they are mine to keep and I can do with them what I please. But cards on Arena are trapped in there and if the company goes belly up then I will lose my cards. Sixthly, collecting needs to be satisfying. I think in some ways this is related to the first worry. Basically this has two sides, first there has to be some sense that there is some effort involved in obtaining the items. Either monetary expense or like some kind of effort. But the flip side is that there has to be a sense of accomplishment. One of the problems with collecting Magic cards is just the sheer number of them. It just feels like I will never have a complete collection in any sense.

So, I guess I have tried to come up with a solution to these and other problems. An idea I had just yesterday was to try to focus on collecting in video games. This of course has the worry about an ecosystem with a lifespan. But I was thinking about trying to compare and contrast different collecting systems in different games. So this copes with that a bit in terms of feeling like rather than putting all my eggs in one basket I can try different systems. I was also thinking about doing collecting in video games that doesn't cost additional money beyond the initial cost of the game but rather collecting through playing the game.

So, I think that would be an interesting project but it remains to be seen whether this would truly be satisfying. I guess the purpose of this post is just to try to put this idea down so I can come back to it and see if the project takes off or if it just dies on the vine.