Update 14

 In some ways I haven’t been super active on the games front lately. Part of that is just dealing with some stuff on the work front related to changing jobs. I have also been reading some sci fi books instead of spending time on gaming. The new job situation seems to be going ok. I have been guilty of procrastinating a number of things but I got some of that stuff done this week. I went to a training session this last Tuesday. I actually start this next Monday. My boss has offered to do some lesson planning with me for a good chunk of time before my first class. Overall I am excited and looking forward to it but also nervous.

So what have I been doing on the gaming front.

-have played Commander a few times with the twins. My deck seems to be doing well and I won one time and seem to more of a threat to win the game than I was in the past.

-I finished working on my character for solo play with the Witchcraft RPG. I am fairly happy with the character. I think that is one of the things about using a game system to make a character as opposed to just writing whatever you feel like. The game system introduces limits. You can’t do everything you want to do. Especially for a new character. In some ways this is more interesting than just making up a character because often with making up a character what you produce doesn’t really match the potential of what you envisioned but at the same time you are not negotiating with some specific constraints. With the specific constraints of the game system it feels like what is produced is better in way than what I would produce on my own.

-I also developed an idea for a character in a solo Shadowrun 3rd edition game. I started working on the character and have a solid concept and have made some progress with the actual stats and toys.

-I have been collecting some roleplaying pdfs from drivethrurpg. These make a good reward for getting through some tough stuff because there are plenty that are reasonably priced.

-I played a session of best of 3 pioneer on Arena. It was on the ranked ladder. I used a blue-white control deck that Chatgpt brewed for me. I lost both matches but I have been pretty much in beginner mind with this particular format.

-I have also been watching some baseball from time to time.

Beyond that I have been doing some things that I hope will have an impact on my gaming but are sort of outside the scope of that.

-as I mentioned I have been reading some sci fi. I guess I would like to think that I am gaining some inspiration for my own solo rp and world building. I really haven’t read much fiction in the last 10 years although I have read some. It has been feeling good to get into it and I feel happy to have a bit more of a target in terms of looking at sci-fi.

-I have continued to think about the concept of value and how it applies to various aspects of my life. One of the things I have been wanting to do is more wheeling and dealing. A perfect opportunity came up recently. My wife bought a new ipad some time back. It is a powerful model but in many ways she has been disappointed with it because she has had serious problems with the multi-tasking abilities. I on the other hand have been wanting some kind of e-reader but was sort of wanting an ipad because I have books in a variety of apps at least one of which is only on ios. I was able to read books on my macbook air but I didn’t often do it because it doesn’t feel that comfortable to lay in bed with a laptop. I have experience reading with an ipad and like it but my old one is at the end of its life. So I proposed a trade with my wife and she agreed. Another wheeling and dealing thing I did was to take a bunch of old cds and dvds that my wife didn’t want anymore up to this used media store I know. I didn’t get a whole lot for them but I was able to get 5 cds I was interested in and a little bit of cash. It’s better than them just getting thrown out. I intend to keep looking for opportunities like this. It reminds me a bit of a story I read one time about a guy who started out with a red paperclip and traded up until he had a house. Everything I saw made me believe it was a true story.

World Anvil

 There is a website that I have been using for awhile but unfortunately only sporadically but which I am trying to engage with more.

It is called World Anvil and it is a website that is designed to help people, whether they are writers or dungeon masters, create the people and worlds and lore that they want to inhabit.

My profile 

Unfortunately my worlds are not that developed yet but I thought I would link to my profile and hopefully I will work on them more.

The website is interesting. In some ways there are a lot of features but they often aren't very intuitive and there is a definite learning curve to using the site. So it can be a bit frustrating to use but I am gradually kind of learning more about it.

I guess my one other complaint with the site is that it does kind of have more of a slant toward fantasy worlds. It is of course possible to work around this slant and there are some features for sci-fi authors or for other kinds of worlds but it is something that needs to be worked around a bit.

 

Consistency is the hobgoblin of mediocre minds

I guess I have to put myself firmly in the camp of mediocre minds in that regard. I have had an obsession with finding some one calling or one identity that I could get ahold of and then base my entire life around. I think this has to do with a variety of things.

The way I actually work in real life is that I have a lot of different parts of me that have different feelings about almost everything I am involved with. Those parts can be louder or quieter at different times.

 The problem comes from this disconnect. Basically wanting to be a total consistent, unified person on the one hand but in actuality being a fragmented and inconsistent person.

Of course in some ways I have had to learn to be more consistent. There are certain things in life that you have to be consistent about. These could range from showing up at work when I am supposed to or being involved in a relationship where some degree of consistency is required.

But I feel like with regard to my various pursuits I have for a long time wanted to find one specific pursuit that I could be obsessive about and excel at. But the reality is that I just don't work that way.

I have already developed and continue to make more characters that I use in solo role playing but which also represent parts of me. Some of these characters represent my engagement with various games. Some represent other aspects.

But even in this realm the specter of consistency raises its head. Somehow I also feel conflicted about having a unified narrative vs many independent threads that may connect but also may be at odds. Often when it comes to fandoms, people obsess about the consistency of the lore and point to any inconsistencies as evidence of poor craftsmanship. But part of me feels like I would like to get away from that perspective.

 So I guess in some ways I am leaning towards having a large and messy meta-game that can have many threads that might sometimes be contradictory but which nonetheless is embraced in some kind of whole.

Getting value

 I have a bad habit of spending money on things or asking for things as gifts only to let them languish collecting dust after I get them. Lately this has led to some thoughts about value. There are several levels to this thought.

The first level is that as I mention I would like to get more value out of the things I have collected whatever they may be or subscriptions to websites etc. This goes along with the desire to spend less time journaling that I have talked about before. I would like to spend more time actually getting value out of stuff.

The second level is within games. Basically being more value conscious in the games I play such as chess where one values pieces or a position. But also in all the games. Value is also a big concept in Magic. But really all games involve considerations of value. I would like to make an effort to get more value from my pieces in the games I play.

Lastly there is the level of getting value from my experience. I have in mind both my real world experience but also my experience in the world of games both in terms of games and gaming in general but also with specific games like chess or magic.

I feel this is a shift in how I have considered things. I guess in the past I have had some type of hoarder mentality where I have a tendency to hoard stuff but without making use of it. So this is probably not going to be an overnight change, it will probably be gradual but I guess this is a statement of intention.